The gender egalitarian masculist movement is tiny.
By “gender egalitarian,” I mean “believes men and women are more similar than they are different and fights against the sexist institutions and cultural narratives that try to make them more different than they are, while avoiding being racist, homophobic, transphobic, classist, ableist, etc. and not advocating violence, hate or stereotypes against a particular group.” And, unfortunately, there are not nearly enough of them fighting for men’s rights.
For instance, consider r/MensRights, the largest men’s rights group on Reddit. They have recently appointed AnnArchist as a new mod. He has a history of transphobia, advocating murder and violence, calling women “cum dumpsters” and “shrews” and bragging about “persuading” women into sex with him after they say no. In addition, he is a member of the r/beatingwomen subreddit. I feel it is not too much to ask that members of a gender egalitarian movement not find beating people of a particular gender hilarious. That is, like, the bare minimum requirement.
All too often, the mainstream men’s rights movement is not gender egalitarian at all. All too often, those of us who support equal rights for everyone– no matter what our differences in opinion– have found our voices drowned out by misogynistic, rape-apologist and frankly stupid asshats. That has to change.
One of NSWATM’s biggest problems is its lack of inclusiveness. It’d be less of an issue if we were just one of a thousand truly gender egalitarian masculist blogs. If we didn’t talk about the problem of male homelessness, then one of the other blogs would take of the slack. But NSWATM is one of a few voices in one very lonely wilderness. We have a responsibility to try to cover all the issues, as much as we can, and I worry about that. A lot.
But you know what? I’m upper-middle class, white and nineteen years old. There are things I cannot write about, because I don’t know my shit. I can’t talk about prison reform. I can’t talk about growing up male in a working-class neighborhood, or about the intersection of masculinity and race. I don’t know what it’s like to be a construction worker or a logger. I can’t talk about divorce or fatherhood. Sometimes I’m pretty sure the only things I’m qualified to talk about are suicidal depression and sex.
There has to be more than me.
So I’m asking you, everyone who’s reading this: if you can write, write. It doesn’t matter if you come from an MRA background or a feminist background or discovered NSWATM while searching for “i want to circumcised my uncircumcised anus without sergury.” (Yes, that is an actual search term.) All you have to do is not make jokes about beating people of a particular gender, and you will already be better than AnnArchist.
Radical feminists and MRAs, trans people and cis people, queers and straight people, white people and people of color, people of all social classes, people working on their PhDs in gender studies and people who’ve never read a bell hooks book, men and women and miscellaneous… it’s time to write about men.
Critique our posts! Tell us where we’re wrong! Write about the things we’re not qualified to write about, or about the issues we’ve overlooked! Cover angles we haven’t thought of! Make us irrelevant! I’m begging you, come up with such brilliant theory that NSWATM seems as out-of-date, as full of mistakes, as completely missing the point as The Feminine Mystique.
Because only then– only when NSWATM is a half-forgotten trivia question– will we have a movement. A living movement. A movement that can change the world.